Neither, thanks

Every day I tell myself not to spend money. Conserve, save, don't give it away for God's sake. Today, I even brought my own lunch to work--Amy Chan's instant miso soup--and ate in relative peace. Then my co-workers came around asking if I wanted to join them for lunch, and even though I'd already eaten, I was like, What the hell, I could use a break from this place. Next thing you know I'm sipping Dr. Pepper out of a plastic cup and picking at an over-sized plate of chili cheese fries. I ended up paying $7 -something for that meal that I didn't really need.

Then again, I learned a valuable lesson. Chili cheese fries is perhaps the only dish you can order in this state without the waitress asking, "Red or green?"

But maybe it was just this particular restaurant slacking off. I'm sure there are other restaurants where even the chili cheese fries aren't safe from red or green chile.