Tuesday, September 14, 2004

Oh, the irony

This post continues an unprecedented series of entries about Chris. And to think, he used to complain that I never mentioned him enough.

"I have a whole section of my website devoted to you," he whimpered. "You're listed under my list of favorite things!"

I rolled my eyes.

But this morning Chris woke up sneezing and said he had a headache. His right ear was ringing. All of which was grounds for anxiety, given that he'd been mauled by a bull in February while playing rodeo clown in Kaumana.

But he managed to heal so well that you could forget he'd been in a coma for days, comatose for weeks (especially, if like me, you didn't meet him until the only exterior remainders of the injury was a goofy busted lip and a weird eye twitch). And the next thing you know you're poking fun at his belly and making food stamp jokes at him.

I should have known better.

You see, I am pathetically prone to guilt.

And as soon as Chris-I-took-a-bull's-horn-to-the-face mentioned "headache" and "ringing ear" I imagined a hairline crack in his skull slowly widening under his skin and his mother possibly blaming me because I'd uttered the words "God damnit" in her house (don't ask).

Before dropping him off at work, we stopped and bought Excedrin, extra strength. After listening to him list off the medications and pain killers they'd had him on in the hospital I began to wonder if even Excedrin, extra strength would be strong enough. Obviously, he had a built up tolerance for drugs.

"Don't overdose," I said, wondering if it was wise to leave someone who'd been on novacane and God knows what else with a bottle of over the counter pills.

Then he called me as I was driving to an assignment in South Kohala and told me he thought he was coming down with a cold. A cold.

People who have been horned in the face and then trampled on by a bull should not be allowed to get HEADACHES because they are coming down with a cold.

But alas I think it's true because I think I may be coming down with a cold too.

God damnit!