So my department is made up of a bunch of Scrooges. You can imagine their reaction when the sign showed up on the staff bulletin board: Sign up for Christmas Party Talent Show. And then in smaller print it went on to explain if someone or a group of someones from each department didn't volunteer for the talent show, the department head would be automatically nominated.

My department head is the guy who screamed at the lady who brought tinsel near the Festivus Pole.

At one of our irregular department meetings, a bunch of us started teasing him about, "So what you going to perform? You ready to get up there?"

He said no, no way was he doing anything.

"It's mandatory," piped up Kim, one of my coworkers. "If no one volunteers, you have to. But it'll be really, really fun."

Moregrumbling and then my boss said, "Who's dumb idea was this anyway?"

Silence.

And then Kim timidly raised her hand.

That's right. The person who suggested the uber fun talent show came from my own department. That's right. The person who suggested doing something fun came from my own department. I didn't know whether to admire her independent spirit or scoff at the sheer stupidity of basically stabbing the rest of her department in the back.

Because everyone around the table promptly began groaning and saying they didn't like the idea.

"But it'll be really, really fun I promise," Kim kept saying.

Come to think of it, she usually spends her smoke breaks with people outside our own department. Ah, that explains it.